A Journey of Discovery.

A Journey of Discovery.

I awoke one morning and the thought crossed my mind again, as it had done so many times before, "I have had enough of this. Life is all about doing this and do that, go for this and collect that.  All my life I had put up with it, but no more. This older brother of mine he never seems to be ordered about as I seem to be, the time has come for me to take my life into my own hands and to move on.

Who did he think he was anyway? Forever telling me what to do. My father is a good man, I hold no grudges about him. Truth to be told he has always treated me fairly. He made no difference between when it came to birthdays on any other family event he treated us alike. The trouble lay elsewhere. My father had abrogated responsibility to my elder brother and he was abusing the responsibility he had been given. I was taking no more. As I said it was time to move onwards and upwards as they say.

I had thought about it for a very long time, now my mind was settled. There would be no turning back today was the day.

I went to my father and I said to him, "Father give me what is mine, my share of my inheritance so that I can go and seek a life of my own where I make my own decisions."

I can still see his face. You would have thought that I had stabbed him with a knife. The colour drained from his face, for a moment I thought he was about to have a heart attack and die at my feet.

It had never occurred to me that asking him for my inheritance was almost the same as wishing him dead. As I look back now I can see that, had I seen it that day things might have been different. If I am sincerely honest I doubt if it would have made any difference. I was suffering from tunnel vision. All I could think of that day was poor me and what I was tired of and what I wanted.

I was very surprised to discover how easy it all really was. Once my father got over his initial shock the argument I had expected to ensue never happened.  My father simply went into the house, entered his room and returned with some money which he gave me and wished me well. 

An hour or so later I was ready to set off. My father was there, as was my mother. It was very obvious she had been shedding tears. There was no sign of him; my brother it seemed,  could not care less whether I was there or leaving. So I headed off out of the farm gate and began down the road. I had very mixed feelings, sadness at my mother's tears, some regret that I had caused my father some pain, but also a sense of relief that the decision had been made and I was on my way. It had been easier than I had anticipated.

Without looking back I can remember that sense of excitement as the capital city beckoned me. I was on my way and the hub of life was calling.

Another Day.

It took me three days to get to my destination. The journey, however, was made much easier by the frequent stops I made to quench my thirst and to interact with those I met along the way. I was pleasantly surprised to find so many places of hospitality and wayside taverns.

Eventually, I arrived and found a place to rest my weary head for a few days before making any decisions about what I might do now that I had arrived. I felt no need to be in haste, my father had been generous in his giving. That first evening I fell in with a group of local lads around about my own age. The company was good. We laughed and joked as we drank together into the early hours of the morning. I was not in the least concerned that I was the one that was doing all the buying, I was after all the one with all the money.

The next day I awoke in the early afternoon, with the first of what was to be many sore and painful heads. I had a meal and headed off to explore the city.

I discovered many inns that looked much more exciting than the one I was presently registered to stay in. Some had there little backrooms where more than just drinking and chatting took place. It was possible to sit in one of those and gamble in friendly banter and laughter washing down the dust of the day. This was a new adventure and I was having fun.